Saturday, June 30, 2012

MEET THE FAMILY

I just think it would be better if all y’all knew where I’m coming from. A lot of blogs seem like mindless computer talk that comes from nowhere and no one. I’m nowhere and no one, so don’t read this post because it’s fake and I think you’re a schizophrenic if you’re still reading this nothing. Forever 21 sells straightjackets in the basement. They’re all pretty and bejeweled. They’ve got a really nice lime green vinyl one. CUM ON FEEL THE NOIZE. 

 This is an over-glorified (I’m not trying to be cynical—it’s just that people POSE for pictures.), over-exposed portrayal of ***my life. ***

 I have a cat. Her name is Star, but she only responds to Starla, so that’s what I call her most of the time. She’s kitten sized and will be forever. That’s why I like the song “Star Me Kitten” by REM so much and used it as my URL (which I should change to something more specific and thoughtful if I ever want anyone to read my blog ever.) I think the chorus is something like “So fuck me kitten…” so I’m not sure if me and Stipe are on the same page about our Stars and kittens.



She’s pretty cute.



the lighting is icky, but YOLO.


This is kind of my band-ish thing. We’re called Eyelashes or PEN15 or Penisland (you know, PEN ISLAND.) We’re a fake band. We play annually at our school talent show each year. 

eating... AS A BAND.
the people being sat on are our groupies.

This was our performance this year.


i played guitar. the bass didn't work and i dropped my pick at the end. ***yay**

My friends and I met Eric Erlandson at a book signing, as well as Patty Schemel and Melissa auf der Maur. The vibe when we were meeting them was kind of like “What website did you find us on? You girls are…cute. I signed your thing so….move along now. Go find your parents.” I dunno, Hole is my favorite band, and this was really disappointing, so I sobbed and went on a huge rant about dying and how the universe should kill us all because nothing matters anyway and all sense of anything special is fake and made up and if Kurt Cobain wasn’t worthy, than why should we be?!?!?! (Obviously, I chose not to say most of this out loud.)


i got my copy of my body the hand grenade signed

I HAVE FRIENDS. Here are some of them.


ruby
(we make balloon animals-- that's what these kids are into these days)

kate
lauk (lark)
adrianna

ruby and lauk

me and kate-- or if you're reading this, (eh i doubt it) KATE AND I
kate-- i must admit, I AM PROUD OF THIS PICTURE OKAY?
ruby and her sissss
I went to play at mini festival thing with Ruby. I played bass with her on a version of “Sticks and Stones” by the Pierces. Someone said we reminded him of a “female version of the Violent Femmes.” I must admit, I was delighted.

before the show, i decided i wanted to be bleeehhhck.
you know...
you already know who it is

me skipping

i ate three bowls of these strawberries. i like strawberries. a lot.
             Fast forward to the last day of school with (in order of appearance) Ruby, Adrianna, and Kate. (Kate wasn't exactly in any of the pictures that I posted, but we're in her house!)




i was humping sitting on a sea manatee in front of a mapplethorpe print
as i said on facebook, "mapplethorpe would approve" 


heheh. that's my boner.
REWIND BACK TO FIELD DAY!!!! Our social studies teacher, Dom (DAAAUUUUMMMM) was wearing a Marilyn Monroe t-shirt.

Yeah.

 He’s pretty macho and likes protein bars and muscle milk and kick boxing and Linkin Park and stuff, so he failed to recognize the sex icon-starlet upon his chest (he needed to borrow a purple shirt.)

Kate and I got a picture. Yup.



We had to draw a picture for the art challenge portion of field day. HAY IT’S DAAAUUUMMM.

the judges did not appreciate it and we got fourth place (out of five places)

I felt like I should post a song. This song is everything. Listen to it. FEEL THE LOVEEE. These. Sentences. Are. So. Choppy. And. Short. Does. This. Drive. You. Crazy? I. Don’t. Mind. It. Too Much.



I have a brother, if that changes your opinion of me. My brother is nine and he’s really chubby and only cares about baseball. Let’s just say we’re not the closest siblings in the universe.
Here’s the last conversation we had:
Robert: If you look at me, you’re gay.
me: Is being gay a bad thing?
Robert: Yes.
me: Why?
Robert: Only dumb people are gay.
me: ROBERT HATES GAYS! CAN SOMEONE PUNCH HIM?

Also, giggleguffawlaughgigglegiggle, I might as well just come clean now and tell you that I have a stupid crush. I think I’ll be writing about him a lot.

I’ve recorded every conversation we’ve had thus far in my diary.

I WILL be writing about him a lot.

**names have been changed**
all pictures taken by nikon p300 or scanned

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